HER BEAUTIFUL FAMILY

Born Imelda de la Paz Ongsiako to a landed family from Nueva Ecija. Meldy grew up not wanting for anything, but was taught not to look down on other people, and to look at life as a wheel where fortunes can be easily reversed. Meldy’s parents instilled in their children a deep empathy for the poor. Her father, Dr Ramon J Ongsiako, was an EENT specialist who offered free medical services to the less fortunate. Her mother, Carmen de la Paz Ongsiako, was a businesswoman who was loved for her kindness, so much so that when her husband died and the agrarian reform came – bringing along with it the distribution of farmlands to its tenants⁠—the farmers chose to remain with the widow.

Meldy dreamt of a career as a concert pianist, and so after graduating from the College of the Holy Spirit, she went on to Georgian Court College in Lakewood, New Jersey, as a piano major. Her favourite pieces included Rachmaninoff’s “Rhapsody on a Theme by Paganini” and Liszt’s Etudes. While in school she met Ramon Cojuangco, then a business major at Fordham University, whose Tarlac-based clan dominated the sugar industry. It was a whirlwind romance, his proposal of marriage immediately accepted. 

As for Meldy’s musical studies, they were soon abandoned after the birth of their eldest, Maria Victoria (“Marvie”). Today, she looks back at her unfinished piano studies with faint regret. Though it became clear to her when she entered the music programme that a performing career wasn’t for her, in hindsight, she thinks she would have made a good teacher.

The young family soon returned to the Philippines, and there, Meldy gave birth to her other children—Antonio (“Tonyboy”), Trinidad (“Ningning”), Ramon Jnr (“Choy”), and Miguel (“Mikey”). As a mother, she was doting yet firm, strict even when it came to her children’s schoolwork, pocket money, and conduct. Neither Meldy nor Ramon yelled, cursed, or raised their voices, particularly when addressing the household help. (The help are treated so well in Meldy’s home that one of the maids has been with the Cojuangcos since 1951.) Her children have grown to be low-profile figures, leading unassuming lives. Meldy’s secret to successful parenting? “As a family, we lived simple lives with a lot of bonding,” she says. “Always be humble was my mother’s advice⁠—something I tried to pass on to my children.”

Though she admits that she’s no saint (“I’m very impatient”), Meldy has tried her best to live out the Golden Rule. Her strong example has influenced her children so much that they now pursue their own charitable causes. Marvie supports the Dance Sports Council of the Philippines sending international-style teachers to Cebu. Tonyboy is one of the last important art patrons of his generation. Choy and his wife Marisa established A Child Can, the Philippines’ first centre for autistic children.

HER HEART OF GOLD

Known for her unabashed support for the clergy, Meldy has raised funds for many church projects, including the famous Monastery of the Transfiguration in Malaybalay, Bukidnon, and the National Shrine of the Oblate Apostles of the Two Hearts in San Jose, Nueva Ecija. Society’s grand dame has been the good Samaritan on more than one occasion, taking pity on a paraplegic sampaguita vendor, for example. Her compassion has motivated her to touch the lives of others, most often on a spiritual level.

Meldy’s first foray into charity work started with the Mother Butler Sewing Club. It was a civic group of ladies from Forbes Park who gathered to sew or embroider priests’ vestments. It was there⁠—through colleague Zita Feliciano⁠—that Meldy met Imelda Marcos. The two namesakes became fast friends; Meldy was the baptismal sponsor to Imelda’s youngest child Irene. In 1965 when Marcos ran for president, the Cojuangcos campaigned for him in Tarlac. During the Marcos regime, Meldy became one of Imelda’s famous Blue Ladies, whose activities consisted of packing Christmas gifts for the poor and adopting street children during Christmas.

In 1979 then-Bangko Sentral governor Jaime Laya invited Meldy to be the hermana mayor in a procession in Intramuros. This was how the Cofradia de la Inmaculada Concepcion, a tribute to the Blessed Virgin, began. Now well established, this civic group of Marian devotees organises a procession in the Walled City every 8 December, the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. The group also sponsors 500 boys and girls from depressed areas, preparing them for their First Communion. Last year’s batch received their first communion in November at the San Agustin Church. This, perhaps, is the advocacy closest to Meldy’s heart, whose devotion to the Virgin Mary was inculcated in her by her mother since her childhood.

It was in the church that Meldy found solace when her husband died in 1984. Ramon had been burnt out by the stress of running the Philippine Long Distance and Telephone Company (PLDT), which at the time monopolised the telecommunications industry, and soon succumbed to cancer. Meldy was devastated, but with help from then-First Lady Imelda Marcos, she found peace when she busied herself with church affairs, heading the council of the parish of Santuario de San Antonio.

The Cojuangco family also leased their ancestral home to Bahay Pangarap, providing its residents with scholarships and a selling area for them to create their livelihood. In addition, Meldy set up the Ramon Cojuangco Village, which houses lepers in the Tala Leprosarium in Caloocan. She also serves as the chairwoman of the Jose Moreno Foundation, which enables determined and hard-working scholars to pursue studies in medicine and fine arts.

HER TIMELESS STYLE

Meldy became known throughout society for her style. At the time when designers got models from families with good names, her delicate Oriental features, swan-like neck, and reed-thin figure made Meldy a favourite in the industry. She modelled for Salvacion Lim Higgins, Ramon Valera, Ben Farrales, and Jose Moreno. She patronised designers like the late Baby Gozum of New Yorker, Joe Salazar, and Roy Gonzales. She sat for the Chilean artist Claudio Bravo and the National Artist BenCab.

Today, Meldy remains a style icon. “It is not necessary to be trendy,” she says. “What is more important is to choose a style that works best for you.” The style that she has deemed best for herself is a unique one that cannot be pulled off by just anyone: maximalist and elegant, not one detail—from the flower in her hair to the diamonds encircling her dainty neck to the handkerchief clutched in one hand—is taken for granted. As for her take on current trends, what she has to say is short and concise: “Hemlines are too short; shoes are too high.”

HER WONDERFUL LEGACY

This society doyenne has had many years of packed schedules, meeting with her various civic and social groups, but these days Meldy rarely comes out. Her faltering immune system has acutely changed her lifestyle, yet she is still as accommodating and gracious as ever, still continuing to give all she can to her several charities. She finds joy in life’s most simple pleasures now: being surrounded by her family, hearing Mass, and spending time with close friends.

“I’ve been blessed with a loving and faithful husband,” Meldy muses. “My children are healthy, well-disciplined, and responsible. I share my blessings with those in need, and I attend daily Mass with my family. These have given meaning to my life.”

Imelda Cojuangco passed away last May 10, 2016