While there were times the wait seemed impossibly protracted, Korina says she “never lost hope. It looked bleak for a while and there was meanness from some. I would get attacked for not having children of my own. But even though I knew in my heart I would one day have kids, I also always said that women can choose not to have children, too. Having children does not define us. We define ourselves. And daughters should also be taught this.”

The last couple of years have been a time of reflection and rest, particularly after Mar’s failed presidential run. The loss was a blow, she acknowledges, but the couple took it in stride.

“Mar is a big boy and a very smart one. He is keenly aware of what Philippine elections are like. It is a costly game. But you throw your hat in the ring because you want to make the world a better place to live in for as many people as possible. I think the risk he took with the physical, emotional, and financial investment alone, for that chance, earns him a ticket to heaven. But he wanted to see the Philippines at its best in his lifetime—and one of the biggest means to do that is by being President.

“We hardly ever talked or talk about defeat. We’re the same that way. You’re a victim, you’re defeated if you believe yourself to be a loser. Naku, we both hardly ever think ourselves as unable. This is not to say we both didn’t learn valuable lessons here. Mar had to process. So did I. I respect Mar’s space and, as much as I’m never a nag, I also don’t like shoving my face into his when I know he needs to be alone. There’s not much talking between us about certain subjects because I think we already know what the other is thinking or feeling. I believe we are in agreement in our analysis of what happened in 2016.

“That morning after the initial count, we held hands tightly. No words. It meant, “we move on.” A week later, we were climbing a mountain somewhere up north.”

The call to public service, nevertheless, proved too strong to ignore, and Mar has returned to the political fray, running for senator once more in the forthcoming mid- term elections.

“Mar was tortured deciding if he should run again,” Korina confesses. “That’s why he announced it quite late. There were many essential considerations to settle in his heart and head. We were also living our best life away from the daily demands of work. Since we met, we’ve both led crazy, busy, and separate lives. Now we get to do activities together more often—we get to sleep in and binge-watch our favourite tv shows and we get to plan for our future. For so long, it was always about getting through the day, for so long. And then we found ourselves on top
of mountains touching the sky or under the sea swimming with sharks and whales. Who would want to go back swimming with sharks who walk the land on two legs?”

Starting a family when they did also made Mar’s decision to run an even more difficult one. The couple had planned to have the kids earlier, but their surrogate had to travel, delaying the arrival of the twins by several months, falling right smack into the campaign season.

Campaigning for senator, fortunately, is scaled down compared to campaigning for president. Korina thinks she doesn’t need to be involved. “I’m there when needed. How do I feel about it? Even while he was thinking through running again, I already knew in agreement he should continue to serve. It is what he does best. I’ve been a journalist for all my adult life. And I’ve been immersed in Philippine politics the past 10 years as his wife. It is common knowledge that the country needs more people who have the background, the wisdom, the ability, and the integrity to strategise, plan, get things done, and keep their hands off the people’s money. You might say I’m biased. Well, I’m not. I will fight for Mar to get elected and serve in any court, country, or planet—and I can prove why.”

Politics will always be a part of her life with Mar, but parenthood takes priority now. There are certainly challenges that come with being older parents, but Korina is unfazed. “To say it is a handicap to be parents past 50 is looking at the glass half-empty. Older or younger, parenting is equally double-edged. Oh, what I know now that I’m sure many parents wish they knew then. So much more to share with my children.”

Besides, both Korina and Mar are in great shape, not just for their age, but for any age. “Mar and I are both health-conscious and we actively pursue fitness. Mar is strong. I’m trying to get stronger. These kids will help us live to 120!”

The sudden expansion of the Sanchez- Roxas family unit from two to four has already changed the lives of Mar and Korina, but not in the ways people have cautioned them about. There is a refreshing clarity to the way both have approached parenthood. “People do keep telling me, ‘Your life will change.’ Half of them sound threatening, like being a parent means imminent suffering. I’m not so convinced it’ll be that jarring for either of us. You see, this is about commitment and giving it your best. A life for others. Both Mar and I have been committed, giving our best and living for others for much of our adult life. Finally having children and building a family will be the same. We just either add or shift some of our energy and time to this now.

“Nothing you want to do well will be easy. If I set my mind to it, I will make it happen. I declared to my husband years ago before we decided to have the kids that I would be a working mum. Only I can define myself as a mother. I will continue work as a journalist, be an advocate for HIV and AIDS awareness, do my charity, save the dogs and cats from the streets. If I need to shave off, I will know it and decide it. A woman is often judged for how she chooses to juggle motherhood and living a full life. My commitment is, first and foremost, to these kids and the mothering will have to be a carefully thought-of standard. Most, if not all, mums know a mother has only the best in mind for her children. Of course, I balance that with what my husband thinks.

“Fortunately, he knows that as much as I trust him on how to run this country, he needs to trust me on how to raise these kids.

“Happiness is freedom. While there’s no such thing as absolute freedom, one should at least be free to decide well and responsibly for one’s self. We try to stand up for who we are, fight the good fights, travel the trail, give and receive love, and always try our best to make this world a better place to live in, in small or big ways. That’s happiness. God willing, we will raise these children to be the same, or even better.”